[Dixielandjazz] A few more...less raunchy

[Artwoo at aol.com]

Hi Again: 
Here are a few more:
1. Playing for a variety show...a serious singer was starting a very  
flamboyant version of "Granada". I was playing a counter melody on trumpet and  doing 
quite well until a stage hand appeared with a mop and starting  mopping the 
stage. The previous act, a magician, left a wet spot on the floor  from his 
disappearing goldfish routine, and the stage hand was directed to clean  up. I 
guess they didn't want the singer to slip and fall.
Needless to say, I stopped playing and burst out laughing, along with the  
entire audience and the band.
 
Poor Lionel, the troubadour, didn't see the humor in this and became very  
irritated and started swearing at the audience, the stage hand and the  
band...the emcee had to call the next act. What a hoot!
 
2. A very drunk fellow appeared at the wedding we were playing for. I  
recognized him as a guy that liked to follow the band. He acted like he was part  of 
the family and posed for pictures with the bride and groom practically  
knocking everyone over. I overheard members from the groom and bride, saying "He  
must be from their family; we don't recognize him."
 
3. At senior citizen dance, an audience member brought in his 2 suitcase  
collection of harmonicas and proceeded to take a few choruses on each and every  
harmonica. The problem was that he was playing into a goose-necked mike which  
was slowing falling to the ground. After each harmonica change he had to bend 
 lower and lower (like a limbo contest). He didn't see the humor in his  
predicament, but of course I did and chuckled quite loudly the whole time. I  
guess I am somewhat sadistic and didn't offer to raise the mike for him.