[Dixielandjazz] Musician Jokes

[Rick Knittel]

Q:   What's the difference between a guitar player and a large pizza?
A:    A large pizza can feed a family of four. 


Q:   How can you tell the difference between all the banjo songs?
A:   By their names. 


Q:   Why are harps like elderly parents?
A:   Both are unforgiving and hard to get into and out of cars. 


Q:   What's the difference between a trombone and a lawnmower?
A:   It's easier to find work in the summer with a lawnmower. 


A young child says to his mother, "Mom, when I grow up I think I'd like
to be a musician." She replies, "Well honey, you know you can't do both."



Q:   How are musicians like linoleum?
A:   Lay them once and you can walk on them forever. ! 


Q:  What's the difference between the front desk of violas and the back
desk of violas?
A:  At least a semi-tone! 


Q:    What's the difference between a saxophone and a chainsaw?
A:    The grip. 


Q:   There are two bass players sitting in a car. Who's driving?
A:   The policeman. 


Q:   What's the difference between an oboe and a bassoon?
A:   You can hit a baseball further with a bassoon. 


Q:    How do you get a trumpet player to play softly?
A:    Take away his instrument. 


Rick Knittel
The Maine Street Paraders