[Dixielandjazz] Chordal Averaging

[billsharp]

I find it interesting that Bill "the washboardist" Gunter's  "Chordal 
Averaging Method" follows the same line of reasoning in that 2 plus 2 
equals 5, for exceptionally large values of 2. Also note that, by this 
method, the average produced by washboard players of all chords in a 
tune is  0+0+0+..."ad infinitum' which, when averaged, is surprisingly 
enough (actually, to no one's surprise)  Zero.  This keeps  the math 
for washboard players exceedingly simple, once you sit down with them 
and carefully explain it, using large crayons in bold colors and simple 
drawings which, for a few of them, has caused the dystonia discussed in 
a previous DJML newsletter.

Some of the most musical (a loosely used term  in this case) washboard 
players attach what they apparently consider as musical instruments to 
their washboards, such as whistles, and squeeze-bulb horns to their 
washboards, hoping to be included into the fraternity of musicians, but 
alas, to no avail. The chordal averaging of the chords produced by 
those instruments is still zero, no matter how they crunch the numbers. 
  Fortunately for most washboard players, many of them get invited to 
"perform" in musical groups based on their wonderful personalites, as 
is this case with Mr. Gunter, who could charm the skin off a snake, 
through glibness alone.

Has anyone else noticed that washboard players do have a habit, common 
among every one of them, of suddenly and constantly turning around and 
staring at members of the band.  I discovered the reason behind this 
when I one time overheard two washboard players talking and one asked 
the other, "Don't you constantly just have to turn around and stare 
down members of the band just to just to make sure that they're not 
laughing at you behind your back?"  The other washboard player agreed 
that this was indeed a problem.