[Dixielandjazz] extemporaneous noises?

[tcashwigg at aol.com]

There is one other sound worse than that Ted:

  While on tour in Spain and doing a street parade wearing the Big Bass 
drum they were leading us down a pedestrian only street with the 
drummers in the back of the band and nobody came back there to tell us 
when we came upon the just short of waist high poles across the street 
entrance to prohibit autos from going down the street.  Not to mention 
the numerous unseen curbs we stepped off of as well.

  Now let me tell you when the Bass Drummer who cannot see where he is 
going over the drum walks astraddle of one of those and goes down on 
the street, it is an indescribable sound but one you certainly will 
never forget, sort of akin to the squeals of a rabbit being caught by a 
coyote would be about the best I could describe it, punctuated with 
some English Ghetto words that even Spanish Sailors have never heard 
uttered in ernest with Prayers of help to sweet Jesus mother mary of 
God and anybody else hit in the crotch with a steel pipe.  :((  ouch!   
It could also be a secret RAPE or Birth CONTROL DEVISE INVENTED BY THE 
SPANISH SECRET POLICE TOO, given the reputation of many drummers.  :))  
whatever it is, it works very well.

Marching the poor sightless fellow down a flight of unknown and non 
visible stairs accomplishes a similar situation as he misses the first 
step and goes end over end down the entire flight being beaten severely 
about the head and shoulders by the drum.

Now you know why there is supposed to be a GRAND MARSHALL?  and just 
two of his duties, he is also supposed to dance about in and out of the 
crowd to keep the jovial and often over enthusiastic revelers from 
bumping into the horn players and driving their mouthpieces into their 
teeth.   He looks majestic and spectacular out there in front leading 
the Parade but he has a real purpose and is worth every penny of his 
keep if he does his job correctly.

Playing in a real marching band can be very hazardous to your health 
especially if any of the players are having as much fun as the audience 
in heavily Beer influenced festivals and parades.

Cheers,

Tom (where's my crotch armor ? ) Wiggins

 -----Original Message-----
 From: Cebuisle2 at aol.com
 To: dixielandjazz at ml.islandnet.com
 Sent: Mon, 2 Jan 2006 21:38:08 EST
 Subject: [Dixielandjazz] extemporaneous noises?

  The worst noises (not mentioned by Steve, whose band is probably more 
sure
  footed) are made by the lead horn man as he blithely steps into the 
pile of
 horse dung left by the mounted unit somewhere ahead.

  Demand the parade either have a poop squad or insist on being ahead of 
the
 horses!


 Been there, Heard that


 Ted
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