[Dixielandjazz] Worth a re-run

[Bob Romans]

Infractions & Citations



Trumpet Citations & Infractions



NAME OF OFFENDER_____________

INFRACTION DATE _____________



MUSICAL OFFENSES:

[] Playing highest note possible in warm- up-$100 [] Sound-checking mic

with

obnoxious jazz licks-$15 [] Raising hand after mistake-$15 [] Practicing

multiple tonguing not called for on gig-$15 [] Blacking out after high

note-$20 [] Obnoxiously show-offy warm-up-$25 [] Taking tuning note up an

octave-$25 [] Vibrato on unison passage-$50 [] Failure to use 3rd valve

slide-$50 [] Playing B-flat when band tunes to A-$75 [] Being told by

conductor to play louder-$400 [] Failure to swing-$1000

LEAD PLAYERS:

[] Changing mouthpieces mid-song-$15

[] Faking section into early entrance-$10 [] Faking self into early

entrances-$50 [] Missing high lick, then mentioning previous gig(s)-$25 []

Asking conductor if it's ok to take a lick up-$25 [] Asking conductor if

it's ok to take a lick down-$400 [] Taking a lick down that you took up in

rehearsal-$100 [] Missing last note of "In the Mood"-$200

SECTION/NON-LEAD PLAYERS:

[] Missing entrance when lead drops out-$15 [] Pointing out to the lead

that

guy on the record took that last lick up-$20 [] Attempting unassigned lick

biffed by lead-$50 [] Asking lead what mouthpiece he uses-$75 [] Hanging

over past lead on last chord-$100 [] Attempting to out-screech lead on last

chord-$100 [] Successfully out-screeching lead at any time-$500

EQUIPMENT VIOLATIONS:

[] Playing with screw on rim-$10

[] Polishing horn on stage-$15

[] Dropping mute-$10

[] Dropping horn-Repairs + $20

[] Dropping Dead-Warning

[] Forgetting pencil-$20

[] Forgetting Mute(s)-Each $50

[] Forgetting Bow-Tie or socks-$30

[] Forgetting Mouthpiece- $30

[] Forgetting Mags-$100

[] Blaming mistake on sticky valves-$25

[] Getting marble or other object stuck down bell-$750

CRIMINAL BAD TASTE:

[] Having nicest gig-bag in section-$10

[] Talking about the great deal you got on a new horn-$10 [] Hawking old

horn on Bandstand-$10 [] Quoting Herb Alpert or Mangione Song-$250 []

Practicing legit style on swing gig- $35 [] Discussing how plentiful gigs

were in the old days-$50 [] Beginning a sentence with "when I played for

Kenton"-$50 [] Casually mentioning to Musical Director of cheap theater

that

you also play Keyboards-$100

BASIC STUPIDITY

[] Wearing old MF tour shirt-$15

[] Wearing new MF tour shirt-$25

[] Playing on a Jet-tone mouthpiece-$20

[] Continually asking "where are we?"-$25 [] Drunk on stage-$25 [] Stoned

on

stage-$50 [] Sober on stage-$75 [] Pretending to be friends with a bone

player-$50 [] Actually being friends with a bone player-$200 [] Dating a

bone player- $7500 [] Loaning money to bone player-4 x amount loaned []

Sitting next to conductor at meals-$100

Warmest regards,
Bob Romans,
1617 Lakeshore Drive,
Lodi, Calif., 95242
PH 209-747-1148
www.cellblockseven2002.net