[Dixielandjazz] I'mmmm Baaaaaccckk

[TCASHWIGG at aol.com]

Hello gang:

Well, it finally happened they let me out of the funny farm for International 
Globe trotting musos on a temporary good behavior pass.  I am sure none of 
you know how difficult it was for me to earn that kind of a pass.  My behavior 
has always been Bespeakable at bestest.

My first stop once I got back into OKOM territory was the Sacramento Jazz 
Jubilee, where I actually got to meet a few of you, ( you know who you are), I 
meandered around the festival trying to shake hands and greet every person in 
attendance to set up my campaign for the presidency.

Still undecided as to which country I want to be president of so don't rush 
out to the polls to vote for me yet.  You will eventually find the place to 
vote for me listed on the ballot as "NONE OF THE ABOVE" I will announce my semi 
official hat tossing at a later date.  If ya'll all do your part I could 
actually win with no campaign funding what so ever, don't worry I'll pick a real 
musician for President of Vice to run with me.

I met a gentleman behind the porta potties in Old Town, who was kind enough 
to share his keg of what he called recycled beer, and explained to me how he 
had been running this festival for nigh on to sixty years now, and knew every 
musician personally who ever played there.  He said he could also name every 
badge holder and their six closest family members and quote their ages and place 
of birth.

He went on to explain that he had traveled all over the world to hear and 
book these great bands and was a very close personal friend of Ken Burns, Steve 
Barbone and Tom Wiggins, Bill Gunter, Bob Ringwald, and Tito Martino, then he 
asked me "what did you say your name was agin son?"   I told him it was T CASH  
and he said oh yeah Jim's brother from Spain, see son I know all of them jazz 
players like they waz my own kids, Hell some of em probably are, ya know, I 
got a round a bit in my younger days.

Said he had the worlds greatest collection of OKOM music and he bought it all 
from Jazz Jerry,  ( damn fine collection of Oklahoma music it is too)  said 
the records were too small to fit on his victrola and it doesn't seem to have a 
speed setting for CD, wanted to know if I thought Jazz Jerry would trade em 
back for 8 trac versions, cause he has one in the car he lives in out back of 
the train depot.

After four days of quality time with this gentleman, he finally confessed to 
me that he was actually the  most popular Governor of California in history 
and that he was hanging out in back of the dumpster alone so as not to attract 
any undue attention to himself till the current problems of the state pass, 
then he will come out and run for re-election, and move this danged Jazz festival 
back to Oklahoma where it belongs.

On the way out He gave me the lyrics to his latest hit song, "Red Neckin' 
Beer Suckin' Rag Time Boogie Woogie"  which he swears was written for Tuba and 
Bass drum, and he was thinking of adding a kazoo part or a Blonde Chick Singer 
with big bosoms and purty legs without very close veins.


Ya'll keep them cards and letters comin' ya heah, we gotta keep this here 
Ministry on the air and save them lost souls from the evils of Rock & Roll what 
ain't yet turned to OKOM.


Cheers,

Rev. Tom- Bob Wiggins
Saint Gabriel's Celestial Brass Band
Ambassadors of American Culture
1234 Laurel Lane Suite #1
Lafayette, California 94549 USA
1-925-952-4585
tcashwigg at aol.com