[Dixielandjazz] FW: Music terminology

[Charlie Hooks]

Subject: Music terminology

In an effort to keep you abreast of the ever-changing world of  music
terminology, we provide you with some terms with which you should be
familiar:


Adagio Fromaggio: To play in a slow and cheesy manner.
 
AnDante: A musical composition that is infernally slow.
 
Angus Dei: To play with a divine, beefy tone.
 
Anti-phonal: Referring to the prohibition of cell phones in the concert
hall.
 
A Patella: Unaccompanied knee-slapping.
 
Appologgiatura: A composition, solo or instrument, you regret playing.
 
Approximatura: A series of notes played by a performer, not intended by the
composer.
 
Approximento: A musical entrance that is somewhere in the vicinity of the
correct pitch.
 
Bar Line: What musicians form after a concert.
 
Concerto Grossissimo: A really bad performance.
 
Coral Symphony: (see Beethoven-Caribbean period).

Cornetti Trombosis Disastrous: The entanglement of brass instruments that
can occur when musicians exit hastily down the stage stairs
 
Dill Piccolino: A wind instrument that plays only sour notes.
 
Fermantra: A note that is held over and over and over and ...
 
Fermoota: A rest of indefinite length and dubious value.
 
Fog Hornoso: A sound that is heard when the conductor's intentions are not
clear.
 
Frugalhorn: A sensible, inexpensive brass instrument.
 
Gaul Blatter: A French horn player.
 
Good Conductor: A person who can give an electrifying performance, or
alternative use, one who obeys the orchestra and/or chorus
 
Gregorian Champ: Monk who can hold a note the longest.
 
Kvetchendo: Gradually getting annoyingly louder.
 
Mallade: A romantic song that's pretty awful.
 
Molto bolto: Head straight for the ending.
 
Opera buffa: Musical stage production by nudists.
 
Poochini Musical: performance accompanied by a dog.
 
Pre-Classical Conservatism: School of thought which fostered the idea, "if
it ain't baroque, don't fix it."
 
Spritzicato: Plucking of a stringed instrument to produce a bright, bubbly
sound, usually accompanied by sparkling water with lemon (wine optional).
 
Tempo Tantrumo: When a young band refuses to keep time with the conductor.
 
Tincanabulation: The annoying or irritating sounds made by extremely cheap
bells.
 
Vesuvioso: A gradual buildup to a fiery conclusion.
 
ZZZfortzando: Playing REALLY loud in order to wake up the audience.