[Dixielandjazz] Musical Haikus

[Steve Barbone]

Music Haikus 

 
Squeaking and squawking

All eyes roll to the heavens

The clarinet speaks

 
The jam session starts

Someone calls "Giant Steps"

Cold fear grips my brain

 
Here's the chick singer

Stepping to the microphone

Pitch, time, all gone now

 
Gig is going great 

Some one requests "In the Mood"

I look at my watch 

 
Gorgeous chick tells me

"You sound just like Kenny G"

My ego shatters  

 
Three-eight, eleven-eight

Damn you, Andrew Lloyd Webber

Five-eight, seven-eight

 
The woodwind doubler

Practicing the sop sax

Frustration defined
 

Pit orchestra gig 

Days and nights become as one

I have no life 
 

Bad intonation 

Banjo sharp, reeds are flat

Brass, too loud again


An oxymoron: 

"He plays the accordion

With delicacy" 


"I can't find my note"

Bemoans the chick singer

"Quit now," we all pray


Money's everything 

Playing any gig that comes

Whores ... we're all whores


That plate of hors d'oeuvres

Cost more than we're getting paid

Think we underbid? 


God bless Trust Fund gigs

Only have to eat Ramen

A few more weeks