[Dixielandjazz] New Jazz Words

[Dan Augustine]

Folks--
     Just received a CD in the mail from Don Brayton, a fine 
tuba-picker i met while in San Francisco last weekend at the Lu 
Watters rib (anyone know his email-address?).  It's a CD by the 
Euphoria Jazz Band he was in, _Still "Messin' Around" after 25 Years_ 
(recorded in July 1975, reissued in 2002).  Very tasty stuff indeed. 
Does anyone know anything about them or other recordings?
     Also, as a part of my usual snoopy self's desire to know more 
about bands and personnel, i did some searching on the web for this 
band or Don and found the following item from the June-July issue of 
JAM magazine (http://www.jazzkc.org/issues/1997-06/coda.html), which 
i had to pass along.

     Dan
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More Words That Don't Exist But Should (And Now Do)

There's an inventive piece of hilarity floating around the Internet 
these days listing "New Words That Don't Exist But Should." Some 
examples:

BURGACIDE (burg' uh side) n. When a hamburger can't take any more 
torture and hurls itself through the grill into the coals.

DISCONFECT (dis kon fekt') v. To sterilize the piece of candy you 
dropped on the floor by blowing on it, assuming this will somehow 
remove all the germs.

Are similar inventions to be found in the world of music? You bet 
there are. (Special thanks to contributors Don Brayton, Jerry 
Landsbaum, Frank McGowan and Linda Vanetta.)

IMPROVALIENATE (im prov aa' lee un ate) v. To play on chord changes 
you know when the tune's real changes are too difficult (i.e. "I Got 
Rhythm" for "Giant Steps"). (FM)

HALEBOPITUDE (hale bop' a tude) n. The act of "taking it outside" 
when lost in a solo that has no hope of getting home. (FM)

GEETARDY (gi' tar dee, or gi tar' dee) adj. When a student is late 
for a guitar lesson. (LV)

SPEBSQSA (speb' skwa) v. To produce a sound of such intense 
disharmony that any subsequent resolution, including silence, causes 
great pleasure. And applause. (DB)

PEANUTSENVY (pee' nutz en' vee) n. The surge of emotion felt by a 
lesser trombonist upon seeing the wages and tips of a greater 
trombonist. (DB)

BONEFIED (bone' a fide) v. p.t. What happens to the heads of big band 
saxophone players when the trombone section lets things slide too 
far. (FM)

REHARM (ree' harm) v. 1. To reharmonize by using substitute chords. 
2. To cause even more damage to a song on your second chorus. (FM)

MORENDO KEVORKIAN (moor en' doe ku vork' e an) adj. Slower and 
softer, until the music completely dies out. (JL)

YANNI RIGATONI (yan' ee rig uh tow' nee) adj. Hollow, empty, and 
without meaning. (JL)

NEWT FLUTE (noot' floot) n. An instrument in the woodwind family that 
makes loud squeaking noises when played from the extreme right side 
of the mouth. (JL)

FLOOL (floo' ul) n. The standard game of pool played with a flute in 
place of the cue stick. (DB)

FLOLF (flolf) n. The standard game of golf played with a flute in place
of clubs. (See also CLARINOLF, BASSINOLF and ORCHESTROLF.) (DB)

TUBASM - (too' baz um) n. When a tuba player experiences a moment of 
extreme pleasure upon properly executing the cadenza at the end of 
the Saint-Saens cello concerto. Usually accompanied by three to five 
full body spasms. (Ex. "Don bragged of having several tubasms in one 
night.") (DB)
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**  Dan Augustine    Austin, Texas   ds.augustine at mail.utexas.edu     **
**   "If you can't annoy somebody, there's little point in writing."  **
**                                      -- Kingsley Amis              **
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